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When we think about healing from trauma, many people imagine talking about painful memories or understanding the past. While this is part of the process, it’s not the whole picture. Trauma doesn’t just live in the mind—it lives in the body, too. The physical effects of trauma can manifest in tension, discomfort, or even chronic pain, making it essential to address not only the mental and emotional aspects of healing but also the body’s response. That’s why movement and somatic awareness can play a vital role in trauma therapy. By reconnecting with the body through mindful movement, breath-work, and awareness, we can release stored trauma and foster a deeper, more holistic healing experience. The body holds onto experiences, both positive and negative, and these can show up in ways we might not fully understand. This is why somatic practices, such as gentle stretching, body scanning, or even focused breathing, allow us to check in with ourselves, acknowledging and releasing what has been held within. Mindful movement and somatic experiencing can create a space for the body to heal alongside the mind, allowing for a more complete sense of recovery. When we allow ourselves to be fully present with both our emotional and physical sensations, we open the door to a more profound and lasting healing journey. Why Movement Matters Trauma is not just an event that happened in the past; it’s something that can leave lasting imprints in the body. Our muscles, posture, breath, and even how we walk can carry traces of what we've been through. Movement—whether that’s walking, stretching, dancing, or other embodied practices—can help release stored tension, reconnect us with ourselves, and promote healing. As Peter Levine writes in Waking the Tiger: Healing Trauma , “The body is designed to process and release trauma naturally, but when this process is interrupted, the trauma becomes stuck.” Movement helps to gently restart this natural release mechanism, allowing people to feel more grounded, regulated, and in touch with themselves. Scientific evidence supports the importance of somatic therapies. A randomised controlled study published in the Journal of Traumatic Stress  found that Somatic Experiencing (SE), a body-oriented trauma therapy, significantly reduced PTSD symptoms and depression in participants. These findings support the idea that trauma resolution can happen not only through talking but also by helping the nervous system release what’s been held inside. ( Read the study ) A Gentle Way In Movement doesn’t have to mean intense exercise. It could start simply by getting outdoors, tuning into how your body feels, or being present with your breath. These small acts of awareness and motion can support regulation of the nervous system and create moments of calm and connection. For many people, walking and moving in nature can be especially powerful. It offers space, rhythm, and a soothing sensory experience—all of which help the nervous system feel safe enough to begin releasing held tension. The natural environment provides grounding, with the sights, sounds, and smells helping to anchor us in the present moment. As we slow down and engage with our surroundings, we can cultivate a sense of peace that allows the body to unwind and begin healing from the inside out. The rhythm of walking, combined with the healing energy of nature, invites us to be gentle with ourselves and reminds us that healing is a process, not a race. Let’s Walk Together If you’re curious about how gentle movement might support your healing, myself and a fellow psychotherapist have recently created a trauma-informed walking group designed to support people in reconnecting with their bodies and the world around them. ur aim is to build a warm and welcoming community where we integrate mindful movement with therapeutic practices. It’s an opportunity to slow down, tune into your body, and experience the healing power of nature while being supported by a community that understands and respects your journey. Together, we’ll explore how the simple act of walking, combined with mindful awareness, can help release tension, calm the nervous system, and restore a sense of balance and connection. Click here to find out more about our walking and wellness group for women and those that identify with womanhood, A2B Collective. Follow our social pages to stay updated about our upcoming events. In Summary Trauma isn’t just a memory—it’s something your body carries. The impact of trauma often lingers in the form of tension, discomfort, or even physical pain, leaving the body holding onto past experiences long after the mind has processed them. A skilled therapist can help you reconnect with your body’s natural healing abilities, creating a safe space where you can explore both your mind and body’s responses to trauma. By integrating movement into therapy, whether through gentle exercises, breath-work, or somatic awareness, we can tap into the body's innate capacity to heal. These approaches can support the nervous system, helping to regulate stress responses and create a sense of calm and balance. Movement in therapy can be a gentle yet powerful way to unlock a deeper level of healing. It's not about pushing yourself to perform or do more; it’s about learning to listen to your body, honouring its wisdom, and allowing it to release stored tension. This holistic approach invites the body and mind to work in harmony, helping you move from surviving to thriving. Trauma can feel isolating, but healing doesn’t have to happen in isolation. With the support of movement, connection, and therapy, there is an opportunity to experience profound transformation and create meaningful progress in your healing journey. Disclaimer:  Information and opinions in this blog do not constitute as therapy or personalised professional advice. If you feel that you would like personalised support from a qualified Psychotherapist you are welcome to  book a free introductory call with me or search for a therapist on online directories such as the Counselling Directory  or Psychology Today . Copyright:  Content on this website is not to be copied, duplicated or reproduced in any form without the explicit permission from the author.

Having the expectation that you will always leave your therapy sessions feeling positive, light and free of all your struggles and worries is a fantasy. This is particularly true when you are working at depth in therapy. Unearthing and processing heavy emotions, especially ones that have been buried for a long time, can leave you feeling absolutely exhausted. Leaving a therapy session feeling this way does not necessarily mean that therapy isn't right for you. It is important to recognise that working through traumatic events, and the associated painful and complex emotions, is hard work. If you are not used to allowing yourself to be vulnerable in this way, this type of emotional work can sometimes feel uncomfortable before it can start to feel good. Pushing your feelings aside and forcing yourself to move on too quickly after your therapy sessions can increase a sense of disconnection within. Instead, work on regulating yourself in mindful ways which support you to come back to a place of balance, calmly re-establishing your connection to the present moment. Here are some ways that will support you to do exactly that... 1. Breath work Deep breathing is a self-healing tool which can be used to lower stress and your heart rate. Practice belly breathing after your sessions to ground yourself into the present moment by focusing on the natural rhythms of your body. Sit in a comfortable position, placing one hand on your belly and the other hand on your chest. Close your eyes or lower your gaze, inhale through the nose to the count of 5; feel your belly rising up as though you are inflating a balloon. Exhale through the mouth to the count of 5, feel your belly going down; imagine the balloon deflating. Repeat this cycle a few times, as many as you feel you need to gain a sense of calm. 2. Listening to music Music can be a powerful influence on the psyche, so much so that music is used as a form of therapy. Research shows that listening to the music you love can elicit a dopamine release, known as the 'feel good' hormone. Listening to a familiar tune after therapy can be both uplifting and cathartic. You may wish to create a post-therapy session playlist, to help ease your stress levels and regulate your mood. You may wish to sing along to lyrics that reflect your truth, this can support you to explore your emotions further. 3. Brain dump - Journaling Brain dumping via journaling after your sessions can help you to declutter and clear your mind of racing or overwhelming thoughts. It is a way of writing to let go, with no judgements or restraints, put pen to paper and let it flow. Write whatever comes to mind, whatever form that it comes in, whether it be a list, mind-map or word association. You may find that there are some thoughts which come from this exercise that you'd like to take to your next therapy session and explore at greater depth. 4. Movement Dancing around your room, yoga practice, jogging, walking, skipping, gentle stretching; it doesn't matter what it is. Find a way to move that feels right for you. Prolonged stress can take its toll on the body. Acknowledge how your body feels after your therapy session, notice areas of your body that might carry tension and send your conscious awareness to this area to allow for a release. 5. Spending time with pets Pets are companions that do not judge or criticise. Pets do not care what your income is, what you've been through in the past, or what your status is. They offer their unconditional love and acceptance. They can ease loneliness, promote playfulness and encourage socialisation. Interaction and connection with pets can offer comfort and a sense of security which can contribute to a reduction in anxiety. 6. Grounding in nature Spend time outdoors. Consider visiting a place of natural beauty: a local park, or a nature reserve. Practice mindful walking: allow yourself to become fully immersed in your experience, use your senses to connect with what is around you. Give yourself permission to relate to something greater than yourself, take in the view of the sky, the texture of the ground, the smell of cut grass, the sound of the wind rustling the leaves on the trees. 7. Looking after your home environment Taking care of your immediate living space is a good way to focus your mind on tasks that are directly beneficial to your well-being. A cluttered environment can negatively impact mental and emotional health. Cleaning and tidying can lead to improved mood by giving an instant sense of gratification. Start by focusing on one area of your home; what small task could you do to improve this area in your home? 8. Self-care routine After each therapy session consider something you can do for yourself as part of your routine. For example, walking back from therapy and picking up a coffee and a fresh pastry on your way home, having a relaxing bath, or having a browse around your favourite store. Find a gentle way to treat yourself and show yourself some appreciation for the hard work you do in therapy, and the commitment that you have made to yourself in showing up to sessions even when it's challenging. Planning Consider making a plan ahead of your next therapy session for how you will support yourself after the session ends. Do discuss therapy after-care with your therapist. In your session some therapists might ask you what you intend to do after the session; this may be part of the process of them supporting you to consider what you might need after the session ends. Think about your after-care as an extension of your therapy session. Give yourself a minimum of 30 minutes to an hour to engage in something which can give you the space you need to re-engage and ease back into everyday life. What if nothing is working? If you find yourself feeling overwhelmed with emotions and thoughts that feel unmanageable, consider reaching out for support from the Shout text service or Samaritans helpline. These services are available to anyone in the UK, 24 hours a day, all year round. It is important to discuss how you've been feeling after sessions with your therapist in your next session. It might be that more work is required around coping skills before you proceed with unpacking deep emotional wounds. This doesn't mean that coping skills enable you to forgo discomfort or feeling any difficult emotions that may arise from therapy sessions, but that you feel equipped to manage them if they do. Disclaimer: Information and opinions in this blog do not constitute as therapy or personalised professional advice. If you feel that you would like personalised support from a qualified Psychotherapist you are welcome to book a free introductory call with me or search for a therapist on online directories such as the Counselling Directory or Psychology Today . Copyright: Content on this website is not to be copied, duplicated or reproduced in any form without the explicit permission from the author.

Have you ever wondered what happens the first time you meet a therapist? It's completely normal to feel a mix of emotions - from nervousness to relief - as you embark on this journey. One way to ease into the process is by understanding what to expect during your initial session. Certain therapists adopt a structured method for assessments during the initial session, where they might request you to complete concise forms to evaluate your current mental and emotional state. Subsequently, they may inquire about these details to gain a deeper insight into your requirements. In contrast, some therapists take a more relational approach, creating a more casual atmosphere in the first session. They may have prepared questions to ask and will respond based on the information you provide about your circumstances. It is important to note that specialised methods for dealing with trauma, like Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing (EMDR) and Rewind Therapy, may involve an assessment process that slightly differs from traditional talk therapies. The therapist will need certain information to feel confident that these methods are safe and will more than likely be effective for you to engage in. Keep reading to find out what happens in your first session or initial meeting and the potential questions that may arise during this stage of gathering information and for top tips for how to get ready. Some things your therapist might want to know: The reason you are seeking therapy Whether you have had therapy in the past and what your experience of therapy has been so far What kind of support you'd like from your therapist Information about your current support network, eg. family, friends and professionals Information about your current coping strategies What you'd like to achieve from accessing therapy During your initial session, your therapist will more than likely discuss their theoretical and professional approach to therapy, as well as how they plan to work with you. They may also go over their contract, covering details such as session scheduling, fees, holidays, cancellation policy, and safeguarding measures. Some things that you might want to know: Does the therapist have the relevant experience to support you? Does the therapist have any specialisms or specific skill sets and how do they apply this? Session availability - Where sessions will take place and how often How you will know if therapy is helping and what to do if it isn't How to prepare: Spend some time considering what you'd like to ask your therapist - What would you like to know about therapy sessions? Write some notes down and bring them to your session as prompts. Be ready to start on time - Check your internet connection/phone signal prior to the session starting if you're meeting online or via phone. If you're meeting in person try to get there a few minutes early so that you don't feel rushed. Check directions, parking etc. before you leave. Comfort levels - Have some water, tissues and comfort items close by for the least amount of disruption during the session. Breathe - Your therapist is human, they have more than likely had therapy themselves before. They can understand and relate to being in your position. Be open and honest - Try to be as clear as you can, there is no need to hide information from your therapist. Your therapist is not judging you personally but they will need information so that they can safely assess whether they are the best fit to work with you. Making a Decision I use introductory calls as a way to understand more about potential clients needs and consider how I may be able to support them. Therapy is an extremely personal process and as such I urge potential clients not to rush their decision and to take some time to explore other therapists and weigh up their options before making a decision. Some therapists will offer free or concessionary rates for initial sessions as they are aware that if you are seeing multiple therapists for consultations costs can mount up. You should never feel pressured to make a decision on the spot, and you should not feel pressured to go with the first therapist that you meet with. If you decide that the therapist was not the right fit for you, you may wish to contact them and let them know. You do not have to feel bad about this, us therapists are aware of the process and will want to ensure that you have the support that feels right for you. If a therapist decides that you might not be the best fit to work together they will inform you of this. Although it can sometimes be difficult to hear when you have plucked up the courage to reach out, it's important to be aware that therapists are not obligated to work with you even if you would like them to. Therapists that have signed up to adhere to ethical frameworks have to follow guidelines which stipulate that they must work within their scope and abilities. This means that if they feel supporting you falls outside of their scope and ability or they don't have the space to accommodate you they are obliged to inform you of this. Some therapists will support you by referring you to another therapist that could offer the support you need or by sending you directories, links and information of where you could find the appropriate support. Disclaimer:  Information and opinions in this blog do not constitute as therapy or personalised professional advice. If you feel that you would like personalised support from a qualified Psychotherapist you are welcome to  book a free introductory call with me or search for a therapist on online directories such as the Counselling Directory  or Psychology Today . Copyright:  Content on this website is not to be copied, duplicated or reproduced in any form without the explicit permission from the author.

Wondering about how therapy can help with trauma? Therapy isn't just about talking the issues through, or just having some tools to manage; it's about healing on a profound level. The therapeutic process is a journey that can lead to significant emotional and psychological transformation. Trauma can impact how we think, feel, and relate to others in various ways, often leading to patterns of behaviour that may be detrimental to our well-being. It can create barriers in our relationships, distort our self-perception, and even affect our physical health. Here’s what trauma therapy can offer on your healing journey. Understanding your triggers Trauma therapy can help with a variety of crucial aspects related to healing and personal growth. One of the benefits is the opportunity to gain a deeper understanding of your triggers. Triggers are often linked to past traumatic experiences and can manifest in various ways, leading to emotional distress or physical reactions. Through trauma therapy, individuals can learn to identify these triggers, understand their origins, and develop strategies to cope with them effectively. This process is essential in creating a sense of safety and empowerment in daily life. Processing past experiences safely Additionally, trauma therapy provides a structured environment for processing past experiences safely. Many individuals carry the weight of unresolved trauma, which can hinder their ability to live fully in the present. Therapists trained and experienced in working with trauma utilise various therapeutic approaches to help clients process these memories in a way that feels safe and manageable. This may involve Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing (EMDR), Rewind Trauma Therapy , Somatic Therapy, Trauma-informed Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, Parts Work, and more. The safe processing of past experiences allows individuals to integrate their experiences without becoming overwhelmed by them. Regulating emotions & body responses Another significant aspect of trauma therapy is the emphasis on being with emotions and body responses. Trauma can disrupt the body’s natural ability to respond to stress, leading to heightened anxiety, depression, or physical symptoms. Therapists can support clients with the practice of grounding techniques, self-compassion, mindfulness practices, and emotional regulation strategies that can help individuals regain control over their emotional and physiological responses. Learning these skills, can help clients with an improved ability to navigate challenging situations. Rebuilding trust & relationships Rebuilding trust and relationships is a critical component of trauma therapy. Traumatic experiences can severely impact one’s ability to trust others and form healthy relationships. Therapy can provide a safe space to explore these issues, allowing individuals to understand how their trauma has affected their interpersonal dynamics. Through the therapeutic relationships, between therapist and client, clients can begin to rebuild trust, both in themselves and in others, facilitating healthier connections moving forward. This process often involves setting boundaries, improving communication skills, and developing a stronger sense of self-worth, which are essential for fostering fulfilling relationships. More than just coping skills Therapy isn’t just about “fixing” symptoms. It’s about so much more than merely addressing surface-level issues or alleviating immediate discomfort. It encompasses a holistic approach that prioritises feeling safe in your body again, which is crucial for anyone who has experienced trauma or emotional distress. This process involves learning to reconnect with your physical self, understanding the signals your body sends, and cultivating a sense of safety that allows you to express your feelings and experiences without fear. Cultivating self-compassion Moreover, therapy is about understanding your story with compassion. Each individual has a unique narrative shaped by their experiences, struggles, and triumphs. In therapy, you are encouraged to explore this narrative without judgement, allowing you to gain insights into how your past influences your present. By reframing your story through a compassionate lens, you can begin to see yourself not just as a collection of problems but as a whole person with strengths and vulnerabilities. This compassionate understanding can be transformative, leading to greater self-acceptance and healing. Each person's therapy journey is unique, shaped by their distinct experiences, backgrounds, and challenges. Individuals bring a complex mix of emotions, thoughts, and life experiences to therapy, requiring diverse approaches and outcomes. Factors like cultural background, personal history, and coping mechanisms influence therapy engagement and goals, which can range from addressing mental health issues to seeking personal growth. Ultimately, trauma therapy focuses on long-term healing. It isn't a quick fix for immediate issues but rather a path toward acquiring the skills and tools needed to handle life's challenges successfully. For trauma therapy to be effective, it must progress at a pace that suits you, and finding the right therapist with whom you feel comfortable is crucial for this journey. Trauma therapy is a journey of self-exploration and development that can result in many significant and positive changes and a more connected and fulfilling life. Disclaimer:  Information and opinions in this blog do not constitute as therapy or personalised professional advice. If you feel that you would like personalised support from a qualified Psychotherapist you are welcome to  book a free introductory call with me or search for a therapist on online directories such as the Counselling Directory  or Psychology Today . Copyright:  Content on this website is not to be copied, duplicated or reproduced in any form without the explicit permission from the author.

First things first, well done! Embarking on the journey of self-discovery through therapy is certainly a courageous step. It's not always easy to ask for help. Taking the decision to become a more authentic version of yourself, addressing emotional wounds and understanding the difficulties you face on a deeper level takes bravery. Courage does not mean the absence of fear, in fact the Collins Dictionary defines courage as the quality of mind or spirit that enables a person to face something difficult, uncertain or potentially risky. Courage does not involve acting recklessly, but intentionally. If you have landed on this page, the chances are that you intend to move forward and find a therapist. But, what now? How do you find that therapist? You may be asking friends for recommendations or be frantically googling 'therapist near me'; either way, finding a therapist you truly connect with can sometimes be a challenge. As a therapist who has attended therapy for a number of years I've had quite a bit of experience in searching for my own therapist. I've managed to narrow things down into 4 steps to finding the right therapist for you, so if you really want to find a therapist that you feel comfortable with, read on... 1. Consider Your 'Why' You may have experienced a bereavement, lived through childhood trauma or be going through a challenging time in your relationship. It may matter to you that your therapist has professional experience in the specific issue that you are dealing with. Some therapists will choose to specialise in an area of particular interest to them. If they do, this information will be listed on their website. The option of choosing a therapist that specialises in a specific area or works with a specific client-group may put you at a greater sense of ease and give you some confidence that the therapist is well-versed to accommodate the specific work that you'd like to do. When you first meet with your therapist, you may want to ask some questions about their experience. A competent therapist will be happy to share this information with you. 2. Consider Your Background You may feel a greater sense of comfort meeting with a therapist who shares your cultural background, language, sexual identity, faith, gender, neurodivergence, disability or is of a similar age. This is something that you are allowed to be selective about, choosing a therapist is a personal choice. Although your experiences are unique to you, there are some experiences also shared by others that share a similar background. Finding this in your therapist may mean that you don't waste time explaining values, perspectives and nuances associated with your background. You may also feel that it's easier to generate a feeling of connection and safety which will make opening up less challenging. Pink Therapy is an online directory that offer a list of LGBTQIA+ friendly therapists, BAATN is an online directory where you can search for therapists of Black African, Asian and Caribbean heritage. You can also use advanced search criteria on online directories such as Psychology Today or the Counselling Directory to narrow the search down to the specifics you would like. 3. Consider Your Needs How would you prefer to be supported? Maybe you feel a more structured solution-orientated approach would be beneficial or maybe a less directive approach would suit you. It is worth taking a look into the various approaches to therapy that exist; you can find an online A-Z of therapeutic approaches to therapy here . Some therapists choose to use a selection of different modalities and will shape this around your needs. It is also worth noting that even though a therapist might share a therapeutic approach with another therapist their individual way of using this approach can differ. 4. Consider Your Instincts Research has consistently shown the most important aspect of effective therapy to be the relationship between the client and the therapist.The first session with your therapist is typically an introductory one, which will involve a form of assessment. This session provides you with a chance to get to know your therapist and ask any questions that you feel you need to. Trust in the way that you feel after having met with a potential therapist. Do you feel that this is someone you could see yourself building a trusting therapeutic relationship with? Sometimes we can sense energetically when we don't connect with somebody and that's okay! Keep looking. Further considerations Currently Psychotherapy and Counselling are legally unprotected titles in the UK, this means that anyone can call themselves a therapist. Some qualified therapists choose to be a member of an organisation which is accredited by the Professional Standards Authority. The most well known of these membership bodies in the UK are the British Association of Counselling and Psychotherapy (BACP), the National Society of Counselling and Psychotherapy (NCPS) or the United Kingdom Council for Psychotherapy (UKCP). If your therapist is a member of one of these organisations then you can be assured that they are suitably qualified and adhere to a clear ethical framework. However, signing up to a membership body is not mandatory requirement as a therapist and there are many qualified therapists that choose not to sign up. Remember checking out the qualifications and experience of the individual therapist that you have in mind is important. There are some organisations that offer personalised matching services which can take a lot of the leg-work out of searching for a therapist. It is a good idea to do your research about what signing up to these services entail, as often you will be a direct client of the matching service rather than of the therapist which may place some limits on flexibility. Disclaimer: Information and opinions in this blog do not constitute as therapy or personalised professional advice. If you feel that you would like personalised support from a qualified Psychotherapist you are welcome to book a free introductory call with me or search for a therapist on online directories such as the Counselling Directory or Psychology Today . Copyright: Content on this website is not to be copied, duplicated or reproduced in any form without the explicit permission from the author.

Do you feel disconnected? Our hectic lives and endless tasks can cause us to lose touch with ourselves and our true feelings. The more interruptions we face in maintaining this self-connection, and the longer it persists, the more we become detached from our genuine emotions, which can also end up impacting our relationships with others. What is your perspective on your emotions? Do you consider them a hindrance, interfering with your ability to complete tasks effectively? Our attitude towards our emotions can obstruct us. It's natural for us to shy away from things we deem unimportant. Our feelings and emotions are integral to the human experience, and no matter how hard we try, we cannot entirely ignore them or expect them to vanish. Suppressed feelings eventually manifest in unexpected ways. Beginning to focus on your feelings can be intimidating; you might fear being overwhelmed or worry that once you start feeling them, it will be endless. The initial step in experiencing our feelings is to notice them. Checking in with yourself and your feelings daily doesn't need to be an exhausting, or lengthy additional task. To create a new habit, breaking it down into something that feels manageable and making it as easy as possible is advised. This article will explore 6 methods that can serve as a starting point for doing so. Disconnect from technology and dedicate some time to concentrate solely on your emotions without interruptions. With numerous distractions, it can be challenging to notice the messages our feelings send us. Eliminating these distractions and purposefully fostering a connection with ourselves is a beneficial initial step. Try redirecting your focus from the external to the internal, even if only for a few minutes. Consider journaling and identifying any feelings you observe. If it's difficult to articulate the feeling, attempt to describe it. Observe where you sense it in your body and imagine what shape or colour it might be if visible. This process aids in connecting with your inner experience. Resources like the feelings wheel and mood meter can assist you in finding words for emotions that resonate with you. Focus on your body by engaging in meditation or mindfulness practices. Notice any sensations as they emerge, identify where they are in your body, and try to stay with them for a while without trying to change them. When you experience a strong or intense emotions, get curious about what activated you. What was happening in the moments just before you felt that feeling? Have you felt this feeling before? If so, when? Record your findings in your journal . Check in with yourself throughout the day. Ask yourself how you are feeling. If you are short on time, try incorporating this habit into existing routines and practice checking in with yourself when you go to the loo, when you take a sip of water, when you brush your teeth or when you take a shower. Over time you will become familiar with it and it will feel more natural. Working with a therapist can be a transformative experience, particularly when it comes to learning how to effectively express your emotions and feelings in a healthy way. A qualified therapist can provide a safe and supportive environment where you can begin to explore your emotional landscape relationally without fear of judgement. Initially, becoming more in tune with your emotions might seem unfamiliar and difficult. As you begin to focus on yourself, you might feel numb, and maybe then frustrated, thinking you're not doing it correctly. Similar to any relationship, developing one with yourself can take time, especially if you've felt disconnected for a long period. Be patient and keep showing up consistently; you will get there. If you are dealing with trauma , it's important to approach these methods of self-connection with care and perhaps discuss them with your therapist beforehand. While facing discomfort is essential for growth, the pace at which you do this is crucial. Additionally, it may be beneficial to think about how to handle any feelings of overwhelm that might arise when you focus on your internal process. Disclaimer:  Information and opinions in this blog do not constitute as therapy or personalised professional advice. If you feel that you would like personalised support from a qualified Psychotherapist you are welcome to  book a free introductory call with me or search for a therapist on online directories such as the Counselling Directory  or Psychology Today . Copyright:  Content on this website is not to be copied, duplicated or reproduced in any form without the explicit permission from the author.

Engaging in therapy is a collaborative process that demands your active involvement and commitment. While attending therapy sessions consistently is a crucial step, it is just the beginning of the journey towards achieving your desired goals. To truly benefit from therapy, it is essential to be fully engaged in the process, this involves being open, honest, and willing to explore your thoughts, emotions, and behaviours. Therapy provides a supportive environment for you to delve into your inner world, gain insights into your patterns of thinking and behaviour, and develop coping strategies to navigate life's challenges more effectively. Your therapist can offer guidance, support, and tools to help you make meaningful changes and progress towards your goals, but your active participation is key to the success of the therapeutic process. Read on for some ideas on how you can maximise your therapy experience and get the most out of your sessions with your therapist. Honest expression Restraining or censoring yourself will restrict the development of the relationship. It's natural for it to take time to become familiar with your therapist and establish confidence and trust in the relationship, but it's important not to hold back. If you have something to share with your therapist but find it difficult due to resistance or fear, inform your therapist about it. It may be beneficial to delve into the reasons behind your fear alongside them as this can assist in unlocking and overcoming the obstacle. Reflective journaling Select a journal specifically designated for the purpose of reflecting after your sessions, such as The Therapy Companion Journal . Take some time after each session to jot down your main learnings and contemplate on topics that activate emotions in you. Doing so will enhance retention in your memory during the intervals between sessions. Additionally, you can carry forward any insights or emotions from your reflections into your next session. This reinforces your learning and motivates you to start applying and integrating the lessons into your daily life. Notice sensations Develop the habit of observing the impact of situations on both your physical and emotional well-being. Reflect on your experiences following each session. Are you experiencing increased energy or feeling drained? Consider how you can effectively utilise this energy and what actions would be most beneficial. This practice strengthens your ability to recognise and react to your own needs which is an essential part of the work. If you feel uncertain about how to address sensations that occur before or after therapy sessions, make sure to bring this up for discussion with your therapist. Timings Schedule your sessions at times when you can take the opportunity to reflect and internalise the content. Rushing off to work or into another task immediately after therapy may hinder your progress. Choose a time for sessions when you know that you will be able to be emotionally available to digest some of what has been discussed. Use the tools By actively engaging in therapy, you empower yourself to take control of your mental and emotional well-being. This may involve practising new skills outside of therapy sessions and reflecting on the outcome. If you lack motivation to interact with session material beyond the therapy room, it could be beneficial to discuss this with your therapist during your sessions. Remember that the more you invest in the therapeutic process, the greater the potential for personal growth, self-discovery, and lasting positive change. Disclaimer:  Information and opinions in this blog do not constitute as therapy or personalised professional advice. If you feel that you would like personalised support from a qualified Psychotherapist you are welcome to  book a free introductory call with me or search for a therapist on online directories such as the Counselling Directory  or Psychology Today . Copyright:  Content on this website is not to be copied, duplicated or reproduced in any form without the explicit permission from the author.

Something that I frequently discuss with clients embarking on their therapy journey is that achieving the goals or changes they desire for themselves or their lives goes beyond just showing up at therapy sessions. True transformation necessitates developing self-awareness by engaging in self-reflection, and actively implementing the insights gained in therapy into their daily lives. Some clients may discover that the insights gained during sessions seem to fade away once they step out of the therapy room. Although these insights may linger in the subconscious and eventually resurface for processing, journaling can be a way to be intentional about maximising the benefits of your sessions and make the most out of them. This post will cover some of the benefits of journaling and introduce the journal that I have specifically designed for the introduction of self-reflection alongside your therapy sessions; The Therapy Companion Journal. Stress Relief Transferring stresses onto paper creates the sense of storing them somewhere. This process can act as a cathartic release, preventing thoughts from lingering and spiraling in the mind. When we put our thoughts and emotions into words, we are essentially externalising them, which can create a feeling of distance from the intensity of those feelings. This serves as a way of decluttering our minds, creating the space to gain new perspectives. Consistent practice of this can reduce stress levels. The Therapy Companion Journal encourages you to fill it out both before and after each therapy session helping you to integrate the practice of journaling through habit stacking . Emotional Exploration There are numerous obstacles that can make it difficult to connect with our emotions. Sometimes we struggle to find the right words to describe our feelings, but we can often express the impact that they have or where we feel them in our bodies. The Therapy Companion Journal provides an opportunity to become curious about your emotional responses by posing targeted questions and using mind mapping techniques. Identifying Patterns Keeping a record of your reflections and reactions to different situations can assist you in recognising recurring patterns. Without awareness of when these patterns emerge we get caught up in them and are unable to change them. Journaling provides us with a continuous record and a reference point to observe and begin to recognise patterns. The Therapy Companion Journal includes review sections every 6 weeks that serve as checkpoints to help you reflect on your journey, progress, and any recurring patterns that require attention. Self-Reflection Engaging in self-reflection supports you in delving into the concept of self and what defines your individuality. The Therapy Companion Journal helps you ease into this by not only prompting you to jot down brief notes about different situations or experiences, but by posing follow up questions to deepen the process. Self-Awareness Engaging in journaling helps to bring what is in the subconscious to the forefront, enabling us to delve into aspects of ourselves that we typically ignore or brush aside. By embracing this practice, you may begin to recognise and connect with parts of you that may have been previously overlooked or neglected. There is always more to discover about ourselves. The Therapy Companion Journal encourages an open, curious, and exploratory mindset towards self-discovery. Accountability Keeping a journal helps you to prioritise self-care, establish objectives, commit to them, allocate time for yourself, and maintain a regular routine. The Therapy Companion Journal provides a platform for reflecting on goals, making adjustments as needed. By filling it out both before and after sessions, it can be used as a meeting with yourself where you check in and begin to sow the seeds that develop into the sense of self-trust. Creativity Keeping a journal can enhance your creativity and problem-solving skills. The act of writing or drawing freely can stimulate our imaginations, helping us to think outside the box. By jotting down ideas, inspirations, and reflections, we can cultivate a more creative and innovative mindset. The Therapy Companion Journal also promotes drawing and doodling as a means of self-expression. It is designed to keep you engaged and concentrated in brief intervals, enabling you to explore different methods of capturing your thoughts and emotions. Taking Action Most individuals seek out therapy with the goal of making changes in their lives, yet they may feel uncertain about how to start the process. After therapy sessions, some may find it challenging to translate the discussed topics into actionable steps or may not even consider doing so. The Therapy Companion Journal reminds you to consider actionable ways to improve your wellbeing. Motivation Beginning is one thing, but continuing is another. Therapy can sometimes feel challenging, yet focusing on your goal can help maintain motivation throughout the process. Occasionally, hearing something rephrased or gaining a brief perspective can be beneficial. The Therapy Companion Journal includes affirmations and quotes to keep in mind as you navigate your day, reminding you to focus on self-compassion and moving forward. Self-Validation In times of uncertainty or turmoil, journaling provides a secure space to express ourselves freely and without judgement. The Therapy Companion Journal encourages you to occasionally participate in free writing or brain dumping, inviting you to release your thoughts and emotions by writing without self-censorship or criticism. This initiates the practice of self-validation and acceptance. Journaling offers a wide range of advantages, including boosting self-awareness, emotional health, creativity, and problem-solving skills. It can truly be a transformative habit with significant impacts on personal growth and development. Why not see what it can do for you? The Therapy Companion Journal is now available for purchase on Amazon! Click the link below to learn more and get your copy. To purchase your Therapy Companion Journal today >>> CLICK HERE <<< Disclaimer:  Information and opinions in this blog do not constitute as therapy or personalised professional advice. If you feel that you would like personalised support from a qualified Psychotherapist you are welcome to  book a  free introductory call with me or search for a therapist on online directories such as the Counselling Directory  or Psychology Today . Copyright:  Content on this website is not to be copied, duplicated or reproduced in any form without the explicit permission from the author.

Often we live life in a future-orientated way; we think about what we will do tomorrow, next week, next year and beyond. We make plans with a sense of certainty; somehow it just feels easier to cope if we can be sure about things. Occasionally events and experiences remind us that the future is not promised. Maybe this fills you with a sense of dread or fearful apprehension. You are not alone in this. Wrestling with uncertainty can feel exhausting and draining, potentially because it is more mentally challenging to deal with than certainty. The Cambridge Dictionary defines uncertainty as 'something that is not known'. Being faced with the impossibility of not knowing can leave us feeling frustrated. The mind often runs wild searching for solutions, jumping to conclusions and attempting to fill in the blanks. Trying to find a way through these feelings alone can certainly be a challenge. Ultimately it boils down to one question: can you be okay with not knowing? The road to feeling at peace with uncertainty lies in our ability to practice acceptance and presence, but what does this actually look like on a practical level? Consider these 5 simple ways on how to cope with feelings of uncertainty and take a step towards feeling more balanced today. 1. Narrow your focus and break things down Just deal with this week, this day, this hour, this minute, the next 10 seconds. Grounding exercises and breath work can help to bring you into the present moment. Grounding exercises can reconnect our body and mind with the present moment. There are many ways to practice grounding, such as: using all of your 5 senses to notice and describe objects in close proximity to you, counting, or reciting something familiar slowly and rhythmically. Working with the breath can activate your parasympathetic nervous system. Simply put, the parasympathetic nervous system is a network of nerves that relax your body after periods of stress or danger ( Cleveland Clinic, 2022 ). Meditation, yoga, and breathing exercises such as box-breathing or belly breaths can tap into this system and promote the release of serotonin - your 'feel good' hormone, allowing the body to 'rest and digest'. 2. Reflect and affirm Use affirming language to reflect on your immediate situation. Affirmations are positive statements that with repetition can change negative thoughts. When struggling with uncertainty it is often less helpful to resort to wishful thinking or statements that are future focused. Instead, using positive statements that you know to be true and based on fact is important. For example saying out loud to yourself: "I am safe in this moment", "I have what I need in this moment to get to the next moment", "There is not an immediate threat to my existence happening in this moment", "I have worked through difficulties in the past and survived". By affirming what is currently happening in this way you will promote a belief in your own abilities and keep your focus on the here and now. 3. Practice non-resistance Be open to your experience, do not deny how you feel. Denying how you feel can only provide short-term relief; feelings exist to be felt. If you feel scared, overwhelmed or vulnerable in the face of uncertainty, express that. Denying how you feel generates a resistance to what is. The long-term impact of this is an increase of anxious feelings and stress. Learn to lean into expressing and validating how you feel rather than meeting yourself with criticism and judgement. Journaling or creative expression in an art-form can be a good way to ease into the practice of acknowledging your feelings. 4. Stay open and curious See things as an unfolding story, refrain from catastrophizing or creating stories in your head about what you think will happen next. When we catastrophize we assume the worst and tend to exaggerate a disastrous consequence. Constantly imagining something distressing can exacerbate our worries and negatively influence our behaviour in the present moment. Try not to rush ahead and connect the dots, remember that uncertainty is something that is not known, at this point in time we may need to wait to receive more information before we can make sense of things and consider how best to proceed. Slow down, embrace stillness and allow space and time for the next step to emerge naturally. 5. Connections and anchors Our connections with others can support us to feel grounded. Seek out consistent and dependable people, meet with close friends, family members or arrange a regular session with a qualified therapist. Spending time with people that you trust and can rely on for their openness and warmth can help to provide you with a sense of safety and stability. You may also find comfort in physically holding a familiar or treasured item, engaging in an activity or visiting a place that you associate with a sense of calm. Spending time in nature is also often linked to lower levels of stress and improved mood. Practice Research into neuroplasticity proves that our brains continue to have the capability to adapt and rewire in response to learning as we age. It is possible for you to change the way that you function and respond towards uncertainty, however the repeated practice of any technique for the purpose of maintaining your mental and emotional health is necessary. Like any other skill, it can take time and persistence to build. It is often a good idea to practice and try out techniques even if you are not currently dealing with worries rooted in uncertainty. This way you will be prepared to use them when you need them. Disclaimer: Information and opinions in this blog do not constitute as therapy or personalised professional advice. If you feel that you would like personalised support from a qualified Psychotherapist you are welcome to book a free introductory call with me or search for a therapist on online directories such as the Counselling Directory or Psychology Today . Copyright: Content on this website is not to be copied, duplicated or reproduced in any form without the explicit permission from the author.

Social media may be a part of your daily life but have you ever given thought to the impact that social media has on you? Is Social media actually damaging your mental health? Social media can be a force for good. Raising awareness, highlighting the plights of the disadvantaged, and giving voice to those who have felt silenced. It can create a sense of community for those who are isolated, connecting people from all corners of the earth, for collective learning and growth. However, some of the issues associated with social media include cyber-bullying, grooming, invasion of privacy, anxiety and depression. The over-use of social media can cause people to become desensitised to what they are viewing, finding themselves constantly comparing themselves to others and addicted to mindlessly scrolling for hours. So is social media bad for you? Well, it depends on how you are using it. Read on to learn about 5 ways that you can mindfully support your mental health whilst browsing on the socials. 1. Unfollow Are you following pages that have you purely comparing your physical attributes to others? Or maybe pages that display unrealistic lifestyles or impossibly high standards and expectations of a life that you would currently struggle to maintain? The constant comparison can lead to issues with low self-esteem, lack of confidence and an increase in your stress levels. Remember that often the images you view on social media have been heavily filtered and edited, constant exposure to this can distort your perception of what is real and contribute to body image issues. Consider unfollowing pages that do not support you to have a healthy view of yourself. Be aware of social influencers who may not have the relevant qualifications or experience in the subject matter that they are posting about, this can be a real concern particularly when it comes to topics around mental health and neurodivergency. Before taking any information as fact, check the credentials of the speaker, do your own research outside of social media and perhaps seek the support of a qualified, experienced and specialised professional in person. Think about unfollowing pages that do not responsibly add disclaimers to the information that they share. A disclaimer will be a statement either warning about possible risks or setting the limits of the information being provided. 2. Follow What do you want to find out more about? What kind of content gets you moving in the direction that you'd like to move in? Follow pages that can educate and inspire you. Increasing your self-awareness leads to improved relationships and a better ability to regulate your emotions, use social media to contribute to this by following pages that get you thinking and reflecting. Laughter is great for the nervous system. It can lower stress levels and blood pressure and relieve tension, with a wealth of humorous content online, follow pages that lift your spirits and make you chuckle. Social media can support you to feel less alone in what you are going through with plenty of relatable content. Some pages will focus on building a sense of community and promote discussions in the comment sections, this can be very beneficial for those who feel isolated. Typically pages that take time to administrate and oversee the comment section make for a healthier and safe environment. Follow pages that foster a sense of togetherness and support you to feel accepted. 3. Explore page Social media algorithms work to show you more of the content that it thinks you are interested in. The more time you spend looking at or engaging with a specific post or page the more likely it is that content of a similar nature will be shown to you. Social media often has an explore page or feed in which the content will be reflective of the content that you consume the most. Being intentional about what you decide to view and comment on with this in mind will help to minimise seeing content that may be harmful or distressing to you. 4. Check-ins Reaching for your phone can be instinctive in moments where you find yourself doing less, however taking time to pause between your use of social media and check in with your feelings is an important mindful practice. Some questions to ask yourself might be: How do I feel when I first open the app? How do I feel when I close the app? What thoughts and feelings are generated when I view this specific page/post/influencer? Is there particular content that I feel most drawn to at this time? What might be happening in my life that makes this type of content more appealing? 5. Time management Some smartphones can provide a weekly update detailing how much time you are spending on each app, this can help you to keep track of your use. Notice how much time you are spending on social media and ensure that the amount of time you are using the apps is within the range that you feel comfortable with. Another way to support you to manage your time is by setting a timer or alarm on your phone or perhaps setting a reminder to do something that doesn't involve using your phone. This way you can decide how much time you intend to use on social media and you stand a better chance of avoiding monotonous habitual use or potential doom-scrolling: spending a lot of time consuming negative, depressive content. You're in charge With endless data at your fingertips it can be easy to fall down the rabbit hole of taking in more information than you actually require. Pay attention to how your body feels and ensure that your basic needs are not being neglected. If you recognise that you are having an issue with your social media use be proactive about practising ways to manage this. Your mental wellbeing is worthy of being prioritised and you can learn to feel more capable in managing this. Disclaimer: Information and opinions in this blog do not constitute as therapy or personalised professional advice. If you feel that you would like personalised support from a qualified Psychotherapist you are welcome to book a introductory call with me or search for a therapist on online directories such as the Counselling Directory or Psychology Today . Copyright: Content on this website is not to be copied, duplicated or reproduced in any form without the explicit permission from the author.

Are you somebody that struggles with self-blame? Do you often feel that a situation you found yourself in was partially or all your fault, or maybe you feel that there was something that you should have done differently? Constantly attributing traumatic experiences or negative outcomes to personal character flaws or believing that you should have foreseen what was going to happen or done more to avoid it or stop it from happening can leave you feeling trapped in a painful spiral. The repeating pattern of self-blame can be extremely draining, leaving you exhausted and feeling defeated. As a therapist I am always interested in the way my clients talk about themselves. Together, in sessions we often explore the impact of negative self-talk. Learning about the possible functions of self-blame can increase your self-awareness around the way you may have been using self-blame as a way to cope with a traumatic experience. Read on to learn about the role that self-blame can play in dealing with childhood trauma. Self-blame provides the illusion of control. If you are a trauma survivor and you have been hurt by the actions or behaviour of another person it is not unusual for you to have thoughts that there could have been something that you could have or should have done to change the outcome. Self-blame can serve as a powerful defence mechanism against the feeling of powerlessness experienced in trauma. Coming to terms with the fact that there was nothing that you could have done in a situation can be excruciating, additionally, seeing yourself as being a survivor or victim of abuse may have negative connotations in your mind. You may be using self-blame as a way to protect and prevent yourself from working to process the difficult feelings associated with a lack of control and power over the situation. As well as functioning as self-protection, self-blame can also be an attempt to protect others by shouldering all of the responsibility. It can be hard when someone that we have put our trust in goes on to inflict so much pain and suffering. It is particularly distressing when that someone is a person that we have depended on, like a parent or care-giver. You may feel the need to defend a relationship that you have once been dependent on, this is completely understandable as this relationship was key to your survival as a child. Due to this you may have not yet had the space to fully process the emotions you felt back then, it may not have been safe or wise to fully express how you felt in those past moments. Children will also often internalise an experience and due to their early developmental stage assume that if something goes wrong that it is directly related to them in some way or that they are completely to blame. Learning to appropriately apportion the responsibility in this type of scenario can have a destabilising effect. It can be difficult to start to see someone you care about in a different light, to see what they did or didn't do and to start to recognise the devastating impact that this may have had on your life. You may question whether you can still love them or continue on in the relationship once you start to come to terms with the responsibility they had to safeguard you or protect you. It may become harder to ground yourself in the knowledge that you were and still are worthy of protection and safety. Being able to hold other perspectives in mind can be a part of the work of healing and working through the instinct to self-blame. Consider this potential reframe in the form of a question: is it possible that you did all that you could at the time in a situation in which you may have had very little control? Working through self-blame can take time, it is so important to go at a pace that feels comfortable for you. Uncovering and confronting your perspectives on the trauma you faced may at times feel overwhelming, consider reaching out to an appropriately qualified mental health professional for the support that you deserve. Crisis support: If you find yourself feeling overwhelmed with emotions and thoughts that feel unmanageable, consider reaching out for support from the Shout  text service or Samaritans helpline. These services are available to anyone in the UK, 24 hours a day, all year round. If you feel unable to keep yourself safe and your life is at immediate risk, this is an emergency. Contact emergency services by calling 999 or NHS 111 for urgent help and support. Disclaimer:  Information and opinions in this blog do not constitute as therapy or personalised professional advice. If you feel that you would like personalised support from a qualified Psychotherapist you are welcome to   book a free introductory call  with me or search for a therapist on online directories such as the Counselling Directory  or Psychology Today . Copyright:  Content on this website is not to be copied, duplicated or reproduced in any form without the explicit permission from the author.

Although therapy is not a quick fix, people often enter therapy because they'd like something about their lives to be different. Depending on what you are bringing to therapy feeling significant changes after only a short period of time may not be realistic, and as a result you may become frustrated with yourself and the process of therapy. Your therapist may have asked you what you'd like to get from therapy and how you know that therapy has been successful for you in your first session. Whilst it can be important to consider the end goal, solely focusing on it can take your attention away from subtle changes and shifts. These shifts are important to notice as they have the potential to increase your motivation and support your sense of direction in therapy. Don't miss the signs of improvement that are indicative of that change you've been wanting. Here are 4 signs that therapy is helping you to improve your relationship with yourself... Emotions are less of a foreign language Emotions may have been challenging for you to confront and perhaps they still are, but maybe you aren't shying away from them quite as much anymore. Maybe you are finding yourself becoming more inquisitive and open to understanding and feeling what is within and you are beginning to find the words to speak from this place. This isn't to say that there will never be times when emotions feel more challenging to express, but you may notice a willingness to express them that wasn't there before. You may also observe a growing capacity to sit with your emotions for longer periods of time than you have done in the past. Personal care is higher on the agenda Prior to engaging in therapy caring for yourself might have been last on your list. Attending therapy regularly is in itself an act of self-care and you may find yourself wanting to do more things that are just for you. Caring for yourself doesn't have to be a grand gesture. It can be something that you find yourself including more as part of your usual routine such as, choosing a healthier meal option, journaling, getting outdoors more and beginning to think about your personal interests and hobbies. Your upcoming session doesn't fill you with dread Your first therapy session can be daunting! Maybe you were fearful about what would come to the surface when you started talking to your therapist. Perhaps you felt apprehensive about how therapy would work or whether it was really right for you. Opening up to a complete stranger is scary. You may have felt worried about being judged or shamed, you may have felt self-conscious or nervous. However, after a few sessions with your therapist it is likely that you have started to feel comfortable and safe in their company. You've now experienced how they respond to information that you've shared so far and a trusting therapeutic alliance is starting to form. You may notice that you are now looking forward to your therapy sessions. You have learnt some new skills Depending on what you have shared in therapy so far you may have received some psycho-education or discussed with your therapist a new way to look at an issue that you are facing. Your therapy should be allowing you the space to explore healthy ways of coping that resonate with you. Even if your therapy hasn't included tools and techniques yet, the experience of being present with the compassionate, empathetic and accepting approach that your therapist models may be teaching you a whole new way of relating to yourself. It is important to note that successful therapy can be dependent on different factors such as, your commitment and readiness, your relationship with your therapist, and their therapeutic approach. Not every person will have the same experience in therapy. Therapy isn't a passive engagement, it is a relationship. The outcome very much involves you and how much effort you are willing to put into the process. Opening yourself up to a therapeutic relationship with your therapist can be a truly life changing experience of which the benefits will be experienced long after therapy has ended. Disclaimer:  Information and opinions in this blog do not constitute as therapy or personalised professional advice. If you feel that you would like personalised support from a qualified Psychotherapist you are welcome to  book a free introductory call with me or search for a therapist on online directories such as the Counselling Directory  or Psychology Today . Copyright:  Content on this website is not to be copied, duplicated or reproduced in any form without the explicit permission from the author.